October 11, 2004
The Saga Continues
With the Red Sox and Yankees going head-to-head for the AL Pennant again, it seems proper to review the last few years of the rivalry.
Episode 4: A New Hope
The baseball empire in NY has been dominating the game for 80 years. John Henry arrives in Boston and immediately changes the tenor of the team. The ownership actually cares about the fans! A young boy comes into the organization, and the sabermetric force is strong in him. Although they don't defeat the evil empire, the "Death Star" Jason Giambi fails to get the Yankees out of the first round. Beaten but not destroyed, Darth Steinbrenner threatens to rise again.
Episode 5: The Empire Strikes Back
Young Luke Epstein starts realizing the full power of the force. The Red Sox alliance launches operation "Cowboy Up", bringing in hitters with great OBA's who can hit HR. The final show down with the Yankees was going well. Princess Pedro destroys Zimmer the Hut. But clever mercenary Boba Boone puts a monkey wrench in the works, leaving the alliance split and reeling. Remember this climatic scene?
Episode 6: Return of the Jedi?
The Red Sox decide to acquire a powerful weapon to defeat the new Yankee Death Star, Gary Sheffield. But Darth Steinbrenner lures A-Rod to to the dark side. As the Red Sox alliance approaches the empire battle fleet, they realize that the Yankees starting pitchers are fully operational! Can Luke Epstein find the weaknesses in the starters that will let Wookie Damon and his cohorts defeat this awesome power? Watch the premier tomorrow!
LOL! Princess Pedro indeed.
Makes me a dork, I fear... but that's some funny stuff.
Well done. :)
I can't wait until George Lucas adds some new plays to each of these series in about 20 years.
And in the new one, Greedo (aka Bud Selig) shoots first.
You have GOT to stay away from the agave-distilled spirits in the future. Bad worm. Bad bad worm.
But, as anyone who has read this would know, the Empire is inherently preferable to the Rebels.
Doesn't Pedro have to be Luke in this?
...the Yankees are his Daddy... his contract is up once the World Series is over and there have been plenty of rumblings that he'll defect to the Dark Side...
